Books, books, and more books!!

We drove north this weekend for a visit with my MIL, and enjoyed the bonus of a "buck-a-bag" book sale at the local library. We loaded up the van with 16 bags and 3 boxes of books for $20. How's that for cheap entertainment? As a bonus, my husband will turn them around on eBay or we'll take them to our favorite used bookstore for credit once we've enjoyed them. Who knows, maybe we'll end up with a tidy profit!

Sabotaging Myself

I have gotten pretty good at being frugal with groceries and household supplies, but I can definitely improve in both areas. I think the place I need to work the hardest is impulse buys and clothes for the kids. I have no problem buying second hand clothes for them, but I am also a sucker for cute kid's clothes. I have also found that the older they get, the more difficult it is to find good quality second hand clothes that aren't covered in stains or washed out.

I also find myself doing more recreational shopping as the stress at work builds, the demands on my time increase, and it becomes harder to be vigilant about my spending. It is easy to get a quick "pick me up" from the pleasure of buying this or that for the kids or the house. While I think I am careful about shopping sales and buying inexpensive things, the few dollars here and there add up quickly. You would think that the busier I am, the less opportunity I would have to spend, but it doesn't seem to work that way.

I also succumb to those dangerous thoughts of, "well, if I have to work anyway, we might as well enjoy the benefits of a second income." So, I justify another toy, another kitchen gadget, another cute outfit for the kids. What I really should be saying is, "we don't really need that, so put those few dollars towards saving and planning for the future." When I do end up buying those silly things that we don't really need, I carry the guilt every time I touch or see whatever it might be. I beat myself up when I review the monthly bills. The stuff sucks the life out of me. I really need to re-read Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover." I want to "live like no one else, so I CAN live like no one else."

I want more for my family. Not more stuff...more LIFE.

Living in a Fantasy World

So let me tell you a little bit about me and what makes me tick. First and foremost, I'm a mom. I am completely crazy about my kids, two boys ages 3 and 1, and my stepdaughter, age 12. I'm also a wife to husband who is a wonderful man and an amazing father to our children. I'm also a full-time employee at a major technology company. That's the stuff most people who know me would tell you if we were being introduced.

But I have a secret.

I am a bit of a frugal nerd. I'm the one holding up the checkout line with a stack of coupons three inches thick and a silly grin on my face. I'm the one doing a little happy dance as I leave CVS with two full bags and a receipt totaling 85 cents. I'm the weekend yard sale warrior. I love getting a good deal, and the thrill of the hunt keeps me coming back for more. I take my role in maintaining our family's finances very seriously, and I work very hard to keep us on track but still have fun doing it.

My secret fantasy is to be a full time stay at home mom and devote all my energy to raising my kids, menu planning, bargain shopping, and coming up with creative yet endlessly fascinating and completely frugal activities for my kids. I long to be a domestic goddess and the family CFO all rolled into one. I know. I don't want much, do I?

My reality is that I constantly juggle my full time "real" job and my full time mom job. We live in an area with a very high cost of living and it is best for our family that I work full time right now. There are many reasons that we have made this decision for our family, but in a nutshell, this is right for us right now. I work from home a lot so that I can be more involved in my kids' lives, but that means I rarely leave work at work. I try to fit in home management between meetings and diaper changes, and often feel that I am trying to do everything and succeeding at nothing. I pray every day that I'm making good decisions for my family, and I do my best to be a good steward of all the blessings God has given me.

I started this blog to talk about my daily struggle to balance all of my roles while keeping my family and myself happy and sane.